Friday, January 10, 2014

Of Promiscuity and Other Such Arbitrary Concepts

Hello Hello all you who seek my angsty rants
I am here to deliver [yippee hooray]. There are a couple things I want to rant about regarding the isolating and degrading nature of Society on Girls/Women'Female things and their personal life. I think we should just jump right into it    : )
Promiscuity-Put like any old lady would say it. Sleeping around. You get the idea. In our society, there is this huge obsession and perpetuation of sex, and who one's sleeping with, and even who they're not. As a teenage girl who is not part of this perpetuation and obsession, I can only observe and shed a tear for this horrid display of human ignorance. Unfortunately, like many things, there are great differences in the role of men in women in said obsession of sex and promiscuity.
For Men, having sex with many different women is praised by his homies, bros. His buddies, or whatever. I cannot speak from the standpoint of men, but It is my general understanding that sleeping with a lot of people is not seen as a negative thing. It's great. It's an accomplishment. The ability to bed women is a trait off that All American Masculinity that you all know is so close to my heart [eye-roll to emphasize sarcasm]. A man who has all the women fawning over him and begging him to sleep with them is a god among the male species in our culture.

Yes, the Barney Stinson we all know and love is exactly what I'm talking about (but the fact that he's played by a gay actor makes is all the more enjoyable to watch, No?). 
Please, do take note that I am not criticizing the fact that men who sleep around aren't considered to be doing something wrong by society's standards. What I am going to criticize now is that women are criticized. There's even a word for it.
Isn't that just cheeky. The fact that there is a word for the act of shaming a woman for sleeping around proves my very point. and Yes- the underlining, bolding and italicizing of that sentence was completely and utterly necessary. Women are scrutinized so closely by what they wear, their makeup, their hair, their speech, their walk. everything is put under close examination because there is supposedly this hidden message about what type of male attention we are tying to attract hidden beneath our external appearance [eye-roll to emphasize annoyance]. For some reason, women are expected to be doing everything we do to impress, tease, attract, satisfy or entertain the male sex. If a Girl/Woman/Female thing wears modest clothing and is a virgin, she's a "prude". If she wears revealing clothing and plays "Hard to get", she's a tease. And if she  doesn't wear enough clothing (by society's standards), she's suddenly too much to handle, and is forever branded with the most eloquent word in the human language: "Slut". Doesn't it just taste horrible? Why do we even have words like "tease" , "Prude" and "slut"? Why do we have distinct words defining the state of a woman's personal, sexual life. C'mon people- It's Called a "personal Life" for a reason. And then there's this catty hate towards women who have been branded "Slut" with the branding iron that is American Society (ugh metaphors. so good.). Opposed to the male sex, who is praised for sleeping around, women are demeaned and so harshly judged and Slut-shamed when they show even the faintest sign of "promiscuity". 
This society really needs to make up it's mind: Is having sex with many people a good thing or a bad thing?! Tell us already! It's SO confusing because the dudes are slapping high fives, but women are so afraid of this stupid word that people so carelessly toss around. 

Ah, Susanna. Nothing can aid a good feminist rant like a quote from Girl, Interrupted
She makes a very good point. Not only are women called names when they display signs of "promiscuity", but it takes significantly less... activity to be branded a slut. 
I can't be the only one totally infuriated by this, can I? I hope not.
We perpetuate sex, and sensuality and provocativeness. Sexy is good. Men like it when women are dolled up and attractive, and so does society. But god forbid that a woman crossed the line between "sexy"and "Slutty" which is GOD KNOWS WHERE. And then men call women "sluts", and it's insulting, and horrible,
 and It's dreadfully confusing because calling a man a slut is an utter joke. it doesn't happen. Literally, there is NO word for the "slut" equivalent of a man. 

I'm not sure what voice you read this writing with, but right now, please read it with an "angry" voice. thanks.

So can we just STOP with the sexual labels  Can we just let people mind their sex lives and personal lives and stop Slut-Shaming every woman that, may I add, is simply acting like a "man". 

There shouldn't even be slut-shaming. it shouldn't exist. but like many other things (like gender roles and stereotypes, and LGBTQ* hate and pro-life campaigns...) it does exist, so can we just join forces like the united country we Aren't and fix it?

a very frustrated Girl/Woman/Thing,
Panteha ♡

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